Avoidance is the actual diagnosis, and it’s invisible because each individual decision looked reasonable at the time. Tick what applies and see the shape of it.
Reviewed by Albert Wong, PhD·Clinical psychologist·Last reviewed September 2026·About this site
The question to ask of each one
If the anxiety vanished tonight, would you do this tomorrow? The yeses are avoidances rather than preferences — and the distinction matters, because plenty of avoidance has been rationalised so thoroughly it no longer registers. “I am just not a party person.” “I prefer to drive.” Sometimes true. Sometimes a decade-old fear with a story attached.
Why this is the diagnosis
Clinicians don’t measure anxiety disorders by how anxious someone feels. They measure them by function — and the length of this list is a better indicator of severity than how bad last Tuesday was.
The last two. Partial avoidance — doing it, but only with the precaution — feels like progress and teaches almost nothing, because your nervous system registers the precaution and concludes it was necessary.
Bring this list to a first session. It’s more useful than anything you can reconstruct under questioning in a room.
Keep reading
47 guides on anxiety and what treats it, free and without an account. There is a directory of therapists here too — it is new, and growing.
General information, not clinical advice; the people described are composites, not real clients. New or sudden physical symptoms deserve a medical opinion before they are called anxiety. Listings on this site are maintained by independent practices. If you are in immediate danger, call 911; the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline is available by call or text any time.